Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
