FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
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I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
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I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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