who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
