he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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