If that was your dad, he is hot
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
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If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
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I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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