They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize