so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize