i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I just had sex on a roof
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
