I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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