O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Randomize
