It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
