She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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