Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
