Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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