I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
