Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize