Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Randomize
