so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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