"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Randomize
