she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Randomize
