You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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