Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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