You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
we're making bets on your personal life
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
