How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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