Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
