i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Randomize
