question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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