You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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