We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
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The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
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In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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