all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
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He's a Shit stain on my heart
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
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Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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