Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
