I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Randomize
