I can tuck mytits in my pants
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
