I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
