So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize