I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Randomize