so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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