it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
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