loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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