i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
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Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
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You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
You made out with two different species that night
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
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