And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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