he shaved USA in his pubs
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
the night ended with taco bell and tears
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
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