I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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