Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
