I was born with a shot glass in my hand
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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