cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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