I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
