Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Randomize
