are you still at the devil's house?
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
