I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
