We're like a lot better than the average bears
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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